Wednesday, October 04, 2006

WebMD and Google are NOT a hypochondriac's BFF

Okay, so you may recall that I put "hypochondria" ON NOTICE when all of us here on the party barge were going through that phase. Well I'm noticing it alright.

Okay, so the body part worry/issue of the week (and it has TOTALLY been a month) is: Bloodshot eye/eyes.

So my eyes--especially the right one--have been bloodshot for the last month and as we determined not long ago, pink eye is the new herpes (it's going around y'all) BUT usually pink eye is paired with itching and gooey crap. My eyes do not itch or hurt they are just kinda red. Why I ask? WHY? Well I did what any hypochondriac worth their weight in doctor office co pays would do...I consulted Google, WebMD, and all my other favs. So here is what I have concluded. My Problem is one of the following:

1) Lack of sleep
2) Allergies
3) Eye Strain
3) Thyroid Eye Disease
4) Dry Eye
5) Dry eye caused by Sjogren's Syndrome
6) Dry Eye Caused by Dry Eye Syndrome
7) Alcoholism
8) Rock Star Lifestyle
9) Eye Injury

That helps. I hate that. I want to meet the people who write the content for those WebMD/Google Health pages. "The symptom will most likely clear up on its own in a few days. Or kill you."

I guess when we return from our party barge convention I will have to see a doctor. And by "see," I really mean "Dimly sense through a pink haze of anxiety and woe."

What's YOUR health anxiety issue of the week????


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